Concussed Seagull

How do you know a seagull is concussed?  This isn't a riddle or anything.  I don't know the answer.  It's an honest question I never had the chance to ask.  

So, let's set the scene.  It's another beautiful day on the beaches of the gulf coast of Florida.  I'm there with some old friends and some new friends and some middle friends.  We're basking in the sun, soaking up the vitamin D, boozing it up.  You know, my basic modus operandi.  Along comes this girl in a super cute, hot pink bikini.  She's intent on getting this bird.  Yes, she thinks she's going to get this bird.  She is determined!  Of course she doesn't come close.  But get this, she leaves and comes back with a pail and shovel!  How does she know which bird is her victim?!  She must be intent on doing this bird harm, right?  

Everyone just thinks she's batshit.  I can't accept that.  I have theorized this bird has taken her diamond ring and swallowed it.  I'd damn sure remember which bird!  So, we can't take it.  Two of us chase her down to find out the story.  Well Angela wants the story.  I start running interference for this girl.  I've got both hands out, trying to corral it towards our new crazy friend.  That's when I notice the limp.  It's a gimpy bird and crazy girl is trying to save it.  Bless her heart.  Angela asks what she'll do if she catches it.  That's when crazy turned it up a notch.  Someone took care of a concussed seagull yesterday.  She'll call the same folks.  And off she runs.  

Let me repeat that.  Concussed Seagull. Just another thing to keep one up at night.